Buying jeans makes me hate myself a little

I need new jeans. Again. Every time I need new jeans the task of acquiring them takes me months. Seriously, months.  I'm pretty sure that the "just-right" pair of jeans for me does not exist.  Sometimes I think I've found the magical pair that meet all my criteria, but soon after something goes wrong and I'm back to needing a new pair.

I don't think I'm asking a lot from my jeans either.  I just want a durable pair that fit me in all the right places, are not faded or distressed, are the correct length, and don't cost a noticeable fraction of my salary.  Is that too much to ask?

I fail to see the value of $120 pair of jeans.  Which I realize makes this even more difficult. My husband will pay whatever it costs to get good jeans since they are the only kind of pants he wears.  Last year we were in Lucky Brand Jeans store getting him some and I was bored so I tried on a pair.  It was like the flowers suddenly bloomed and the birds started singing. These were the most magical pair of jeans I had ever tried on.  My butt looked incredible and they fit perfectly everywhere.  I decided it was time to spend the big bucks on jeans.  Four months later they were garbage.  They had worn a few holes in them in various spots. I was heart broken.  It wasn't like I wore them every day either.  I wear jeans maybe 2 or 3 times a week. Sometimes less.

Whenever I finally do find a pair from a random clothing store that are in the $50 range they fit alright. Never perfect, but well enough that they will do.  Within a few months though the butt is all stretched out and saggy looking. Bringing me back to needing new jeans.

So today I was at the mall trying on jeans.  I went to the Levis store.  The associate tried to explain to me the curve ID, which seems to be fancy marketing speak for "we have different cuts of pants".  With too many different shapes of pants, not a single pair fit me in the right way.  The curvier ones gave me saggy butt, the less curvy ones gave me muffin top.  The whole process made me hate myself a little bit.

Yesterday I was at Winners looking through the jean selection.  That was even more depressing. Every pair of jeans in that store was either made for teenagers or "mom jeans".  Nothing for someone who is neither of those.

Why does buying jeans need to be so difficult?  It's pants.  I give less thought to buying leggings and they show off ALL the flaws.  Jeans are supposed to be the pants you put on with a t-shirt when you don't give a fuck.  How can they be my go-to pants when they cause this much headache?